A couple that we’ve been friends with have been having trouble. Big time marital trouble. We’ve made ourselves available to this couple to listen, to share, and to just encourage them. If my marriage could survive then surely their’s could. It’s a whole long story but sufficed to say – there have been years of issues building up and it was becoming harder and harder for this couple to break their horrible power struggle. In the middle of this mess are 3 young children that have been dragged into very adult problems – and it breaks my heart. The two adults in their lives are behaving irrationally and selfishly, not bothering to protect the hearts of their children. It has been a mess.
So today I’m looking at my Facebook and this couple…the husband actually…decided to play out some very private matters in a very public way. He found photos that his wife had sent to another man. They were NOT appropriate. He forwarded the pictures to their friends and family and then he posted details of this for all to see. It was shocking. It was heartbreaking. It was the wrong thing to do.
So I reached out to the wife and we met up for a meal and to catch up. She and I had been attending a Saturday night service together and I had not seen her in a while. I felt guilty that I hadn’t done a better job keeping in touch.
How to act? What to say? How do I advocate for the children? How to I confront my friend – in LOVE. I prayed. I prayed for the words to say.
In our conversation she told me that her husband showed the photos to her children and explained the pictures in detail. It was appalling. It was horrifying to me – that he would be so angry that he would put the children through that. Insanity!! I tried to be a friend, I tried to listen. But I was so overcome with confusion and sadness.
My heart is so heavy. I am worn out with grief over what is happening to this family, that these two people are hurting and that their marriage will likely end because they can’t see any way to fix it…. That these children are put in the middle of these two – fighting, angry and bitter – and no one seems to want to jump in and say “ENOUGH!!!!”
I can’t fix everything but I sooooo want to…..
